The Heat Is On!

A lot has happened over the past 24 hours - and it's not all chalk and cheese.

Due to an overwhelmingly pressing engagement - last year's amazing judge, A.J. Benoit and his beautiful wife, Joanne, are not able to attend, compete nor phoo-phoo our event. I've tried to persude A.J. that he could get his Mickey Mouse tattoo removed pretty much any time, but he feels that the Saturday following Groundhog Day is best for him. All the best, Benoits, we'll miss your clever selves.

But hey! More beer and better chances for the rest of us. And the rest of us just got bigger!

This just in - my vibrating Blackberry tells me that we have our third contestant! None other than last year's BigAssChili Cookoff Winner, Kathleen Wright, has fired a warning shot across my hottub. "I'm in. But only because I want to see a grown man cry... again!" She's bringing a steaming hot pot of "Hell's Kitchen Chili" that we can only hope Jamie hasn't had any part in preparing.

Kathleen - you are so out of it now that garnishes are forbidden! Hope you enjoyed your year in the sun - but you're going down - just the rest of the previous chili winners!

To the rest of you sissies, mommy's boys and sour faced girlie girls - get your arse's to the grocery store, find yourself a recipe and send me an email to register!!! This is the party that we've been waiting all year to complain about.

Two Entries Already

Wow, that didn't take long!

Straight out of the chute was 2004 Winner Cherice Chant with her registration. She has tied her wagon to her new designer chili called, "Hooter Tooter" in honour of her sister's famous boobs and her penchant for letting off some steam after a nice hot bowl of chili. This sounds like a good one, but only the good mystery judge will tell.

Second up was newcomer Claudia Dennison. She partook of last year's competition as an observer and has been ticking off the days on her calendar ever since. All summer long she's been experimenting with various themes and twists and has thrown her teensy towel in to the ring. So beware of her entry, "Triple C Chili" at this year's Blow Your Socks Off chili competetion.

For those of you who are still clinging to your mother's apron strings, too afraid to come out and smell the peppers - get your entry in now!!! Only room for 10 and two are in already! Bottoms up!

The Invitation: 4th Annual Groundhog Day Big Ass Chili CookOff

After working out the kinks over the past three years, this year's edition of the "Groundhog Day Big Ass Chili CookOff" is going to blow your socks off!

Never before have so many be invited to experience so much chili in so little breathing room. The downstairs bathroom has been stocked with Cottonelle, the Grenville County Health Department are arriving this week to inspect the weeper beds, and I've personally bought out the SuperStore, Sav-A-Centre and Loebs halepeno pepper supplies.

There is nowhere to hide.

The Invitations
Saturday February 4th, 2006
4750 County Road 15, Algonquin ON
(The Olivers)
Doors open at 2pm.
Official Tasting/Judging begins at 4pm.

The Rules

• Chili must be 'homemade" and not just a can from the supermarket.
• Minimum quantity must be 8 cups.
• Bring your own heating container (crockpot)
• All chilis will be served "blind" to the judges in random order.
• All chilis will be served in bowls provided by the house.
• NO garnishes or otherwise churching up the chili.
• Just chili in a bowl.

Prizes
Winner will receive a begruding round of applause, their name will be engraved on the trophy along side the previous three lucky winners and hopefully, we can get a nice framed certificate of accomplishment printed up for you as well. Of course the biggest prize of all are the years supply of Bragging Rights.

To Register:
1) I need you to confirm that you are coming as soon as possible (Wednesday at the latest) so I can get prepared for your arrival. To do so, just click on the word "COMMENTS" link below (not the email envelope beside it) and post the following information:
2) Your name, your decision to come and duke it out, or to hide in your mother's apron and cry like a sissy, the NAME OF YOUR CHILI (very important), and how many people in your entourage.
3) Digital snap shot of the contestant is required upon registration (that means 1 and 2 above), so if you can master attaching a photo of yourself to your comments, wow, that's great. But if not, email it to me.

Any Q's? Didn't think so.

Cheers.

Mark Oliver
Three Time Chili Contest Loser

home 926-1153 cell 213-1282
mark@comedyafoot.com